inscrutable chinese

sometimes, we so deserve this tag.

all emotion is squashed, quashed, stuffed and stomped into nothingness whether happy, sad, angry, vengeful.

Well, maybe it isn't. But the rule is that we can't show it. Maybe that's why so many people blog about why they're so unhappy. Because to a degree, we all hide what we really want to say, and how we really feel.

Whatever the case, my father's best friend died last week. (and my parents tell me now of course) 6 months after he decided to retire. and my father sounds so cool and calm about it.

My parents have been to so many wakes since I've been a little girl. And they never seem upset. I've never even heard them mention it other than 'I have to go to so-and-so's wake this weekend so I can't come for dinner'.

It's almost a non-issue.

I don't know whether it's a coincidence, but his best friend's sons share the same generation-name as my sister and I. What I do know is that every Wednesday, my father takes an extended lunch break with 3 friends.

and every year, he meets up with his old classmates on the second evening of Chinese New Year. That night, I meet the kids, and it's one rumbunctious RI reunion of old fogies over a bain-marie fighting good-naturedly over the food.

And when I ask him how he is, he simply says in a very happy tone

"I'm alllllrigggghtttt!!!!!!"

Rest well Uncle. It's a pity you didn't enjoy your life while you could, and could nothing when you found out. I really liked you.

Moral of the Story: Live life while you can.