Thursday, September 29, 2005

Spring has Sprung

yep. despite last night's crazy gale, spring has well and truly sprung.

On the way to my internship today, I saw all the rich folks pulling out their summer cars- the Mercedes covertibles with their tops down.

Oh yes. in the short 15minutes of my tram ride, I saw 6 new Mercedes convertibles.

2 were CLKs (one with the soft top) and 4 SLKs including the McLaren!!!!!!! The other impressive one was the SLK 230 Kompressor. and 2 of the hard tops.

ech. I didn't even realise the McLaren had hit our shores. and it's not as goodlooking as I thought it'd be. i.e. those pictures LIE. or maybe, I was looking at it from the wrong angle. It was a direct full frontal, no angle to see the sides, just this giant long fender staring down at me.

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Have you heard X'Ho's Cover Backside?

Everybody be dumb, don't speak, don't stick your neck out. don't feel don't think just follow, love the trend it's a brand new dance, follow from the top and the top says cover backside

yeaaaaaaah.

well. how about you say you're lucky someone misspelt your name so you can still go back to Singapore and hold your head up? that's covering your backside with 3 layers and some seal pelt.

I mean, Melbourne is famous for layering, but it's been pretty warm lately.








Anyway. here's an article in Time about Singlish. I thought she was being a little melodramatic but she made her point. (and I REALLY hated her Mammon Inc book, over-battering people over the head with Christian analogies does NO book any favours. She should take a leaf out of Dan Brown's er, collection. You want me to read Christian novels? I'll head to the Word bookshop, or read the Daily Bread. Thanks.)

and if anyone wants the book, sorry. I set it free in Bookcrossing where it got similarly abyssmal reviews


Listening to: Eskimo Joe- From the Sea

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

well, at least we have a sense of humour


image courtesy of I_Am_Adam

We may be stressed out and overworked at the cafe where I work, but at least we have a sense of humour.

I took a photo of the following conversation, but by 3G LG Phone refuses to detect a port, so I'm writing it out instead.

In the storeroom, on the whiteboard where we keep tabs of our stock in the freezer is a list of stuff that we stock.

And 2 of the headings include "Cookies". But we have no cookies in the storeroom, they're all in the freezer inside the shop premises itself- so beside the cookies, someone wrote (literally)


"Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar :D"

and someone replied

"Not Me! (Actually they're in the shop freezer silly)"

and someone else wrote

"Bored mofo"

and the very last comment

"Get back to work!"

What was really funny was that they were all written by different people with vastly different handwriting- and it was just.... a pleasant surprise when you have to reach the cage by way of ladybrinthe-esque walkways that make you feel like you're lost in that really old Windows screensaver with the red brick walls.

Like picking up money on the street.

Listening to: End of Fashion- O Yeah!



***


Speaking of weird signs, there's a green and white exit sign above the door that leads to my internship toilets.


(image courtesy of flickr.com's beesquare)

Sunday, September 25, 2005

I don't know.

Things are falling into place. and things are seeming out of place.

More and more, I belive in fate. Not the western concept, which requires past actions in a present life, and which involves divine providence as such.

It's all about you matey.

and more and more, I come closer to having yuanfen tattooed on my right hip.

PLACE: decided.

DESIGN: decided

TIME: TBA

***

Also, I've got a stinking HAWT partay coming up on Thursday. The theme is "white top, and jeans"

which doesn't sound so hot until I tell you the heating's gonna be turned up and they're spritzing everyone with water pistols!

*cackles*

so. I need an opinion on white tops because I LOVE WHITE and I have white tops galore. HMMMMMMM.

Please keep in mind that given that this is held in the infamous Loft (yes, Slinky, THE LOFT) I expect to be dancing on tables at some point in time during the night.

what? me? exhibitionist?

Nawwwww....it's just that I promised my friend who's leaving back to Thailand forevermore! How can I refuse????

So anyway, if I post up all the white tops, are you guys going to give me opinions or not?

myst

***

I have $0.23 in my bank account. I'm accepting all major credit cards. Do YOU love me?

you do realise I'm kidding about accepting money right?

Thursday, September 22, 2005

Conversations on a coin


please note all conversations were 3-way.

Heads:

I'm off to the Long Room tonight. Do you know what it's like on a Thursday?

No idea. But it's horrible Friday, Saturday.

I KNOW! I made the huge mistake of trying to celebrate my birthday there on a Friday night. And the crowd. It's horrible!

Oh you mean, right after work?

No no, as in like, even 10pm.

What's it like?

Over-crowded, the queue is literally across the hall, and once you're in, you can't walk. And all these sleazy men in suits try t
o pick you up. Such a pity coz it's a really nice place, and there's really good food and drinks.

Yeah. I told you! All these horrible men in suits, really woggy.

Nah. Not really woggy, but really sleazy.

Don't got to The Trust either. you know that place where they do stock exchange on buying and selling of beers?

ew. Been there gross. Ultimate sleazebags

Where the hell are you people talking about?!??


TAILS:

Happy birthday sweetheart. Love this place on a thursday. Quiet, and Nina Simone!

yeah, I love it every day of the week.

I don't. Fridays get too crowded...

Ahhh. It depends on what you come in for! I like to come in for pre-dinner drinks. You meet so many funny and interesting people here! You come here not with a posse, just ONE *raises finger* girlfriend, raise hell for two hours, and leave.

*laughs* you go girl!

Listening to: Robbie Trippin'

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

low batt




BAAAAAAhhhhhhhh.

ok. I've been working 7 days a week which honestly, isn't much different from uni days. In fact, it's a sight easier given that there aren't any deadlines, and I don't have to do 2 jobs in one day like I did.

Anyway, I got commendment from the boss in one of the joke prizes handed out at the party last night. I'm an Energiser Bunny- and I scored myself 2 double-a batteries.

at least I'm not punctuality challenged. and they got alarm clocks.

I certainly don't feel like an energiser bunny most of the time, more like I'm swimming through what I should be running past. Like the "Brand X/Eveready bunnies" Too many things to do, so little time. and of course, half the time when at my internship, I feel stupid.

and because of the party last night, everyone turned up with massive hangovers this morning and I spent half of it doling out Napro, the other half dealing with crazy orders from customers. ("I want a flat white in a glass" "I can't drink out of this funny shaped cup, you can't just pour my drink in I wanted in extra hot as well!" "I want the extra light one. THAT ONE." "I just want a normal hot chocolate" *sticks finger in milk jug* this milk is lukewarm. I want it HOT. etc)

so with crazed staff on one hand and crazed customers on the other, and stock that just wasn't appearing....*rings up co-store* "Ange.....do you have.....XXXXXXX" Ange:"A little. Do you have XXXXXXX. HAS ANYTHING ARRIVED YET???" "Noooooooo. and it's 12.30~!!!!! I'm down to my LAST BAG OF COFFEE AND IT'S NEARLY FINISHED....have you got the coffee man down yet?" the sigh that sounds like we both want to collapse in a heap behind the shop till while scoring a caffeine IV drip makes us laugh.

the phonecalls to the equally harrassed manager in the other store (obviously both stores have staff nursing hangovers in equal intensity due to staff party) sounded pretty pathetic to both of us who were obviously not wanting to be there right there, right then.

It didn't help that 2 huge groups of people came in at the same time, ordering massive orders that added up to hundreds of dollars, and I had a girl on her first shift looking really lost most of the time, and clearing instead of taking things out whenever she wasn't looking like a deer in the headlights. LOST. Absolutely LOST.

I thanked my lucky stars I had a killer combo (non-hungover) opening team and had done the banking. and I thanked my lucky stars AND the Powers That Be for the boon of multi-tasking. I mean, talking on the phone to sick staff trying not to come in, suppliers who weren't coming in, and harrassed managers to swap stuff and above all, my hungover boss who wasn't picking up (but who later magically wiped up a train wreckage of people falling to pieces) ALL THE WHILE folding boxes/making desserts/brewing milk/making coffee/clearing tables/receiving stock/getting staff to swap with you so you can talk on the phone/running around in general like a headless chook IS A SKILL. of that no one can deny.

How rude of my boss not to close both stores for a day after a party where he made us all skull jagers. EW.

I had fun last night though, and finally, someone got my boss a pair of Calvins since his crack hangs out for all the world to see, and he refuses to use the belt we gave him for his birthday. (engraved on the buckle is "Say no to crack")
Listening to: After Dinner Mint- Jask- Beautiful

Sunday, September 18, 2005

ethics of a to-do list

and I don't mean that in a carnal sort of way.

I mean one of those grocery lists.

sort of like this:

1) Grocery Shopping (refer to shopping list)
2) Laundry
3) Post Office to send xxx off
4) Pay Phone Bills
5) Pay xxx Bill
6) Check out xxx at XXX shop
7) today is XX day! XX comes out today! Buy!

etc.

is it wrong to add

8) call mum

or worse 8.5) call mum re: xxxxxxx

?


I mean. I've heard a few friends express disbelief that I say things like

"Oh yeah. Must remember to call xxx tonight"

and they're like....it must be SPONTANEOUS.

I'm like.

Okay honey. You try squeezing 26 hours into a day, and SPONTANEOUSLY calling people up.

It's not like I *don't* want to call people you know. I do, which is WHY I make the note in the first place! Especially if I know they want/need to talk.

and yes. I know I call like, once in 2 years when they don't and I'm just touching base. But I do call. Eventually.

Listening to: The Little Mermaid- Kiss the Girl

Saturday, September 17, 2005

GAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH

Alright, it must be said.

WHERE ARE ALL THE CUTE GUYS?

How come my more-lesbian-than-straight bisexual friend has the hots for a hot girl, then has her even hotter childhood guy friend hit on my friend?

HOW? HOW!!!!????!!!!!

I need to get out more.

Thursday, September 15, 2005

random post in lieu

These are stubs. Will expand on at least one or two of them.

  • people think I'm about 25-27. (poll of people who know me from everywhere)
  • Gerri got her foot run over by a car while out for dinner with me and my guardians.
  • I think I jinx all my friends
  • Interning in advertising makes you watch your weight.
  • My recent interest in suits and other assorted work wear is not welcome.
  • I can chew again. But not very well. Tonight's dinner? Batterless lemon chicken, plum rice and egg with snow peas.
  • Everyone in advertising is good looking. It's frightening. (and classy English accents are sexy. I'm not talking David Beckham or Burmingham accents here)
  • My boss (the day job) accused me of saying something typically Asian female. He then went on to say something irrefutably male.
  • I am in an 80s late night sappy love song mood. Actually. It's more like a rampage. I need song titles. Mind you, I already have many. But please. Name me more. I need more. There are so many that I don't have.
  • mmmm FOOD.
Listening to: Wilson Phillips- Daniel/Bryan Ferry- Slave to Love/The Cars- Drive/Phil Collins- Seperate Lives

told you I was in an 80s sappy love song mood.

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

office monkey

yeurgh.

One of my biggest nightmares, is to be shackled to a desk. In a suit. I'd almost prefer a straightjacket. Ok, maybe not, but close.

tomorrow, I do the suit. I refuse to be a desk person, and I think I never will be one, but it's a suit tomorrow.

I could whine and bitch about my income tax medicare levy fiasco, but I think I'll leave it since no one will understand, and those who do won't be interested anyway.

and as for lyrical philosopher's tag...

music tag

List five songs that you are currently loving. It doesn't matter what genre they are from, whether they have words, or even if they're any good, but they must be songs you're really enjoying right now.

Post these instructions, the artists, the songs, and the following threat in your blog (Xanga). Then tag five other Xanga friends to see what they're listening to.

in random order

1. most of the stuff on night mix at work. ok ok. I won't cheat. Moloko's Familiar Feeling.

2. some song at work from a spanish-singing guy called Lhasa

3. James Blunt- Beautiful

4. Danny Elfman doing the oompa loompas.

5. The Gladiator theme song.

next 5 victims...

whoever you want to be

Sunday, September 11, 2005

I'm pretty convinced that my best friend in Melbourne is a gay man trapped in a woman's body. In fact, I'm convinced.

Listening to: Soft Cell- Tainted Love

no kiss! no kiss!

I know you guys are all sick of hearing about my puffy cheeks, but honestly. When you tell people "don't kiss, wisdom tooth operation on both sides" and they insist on doing the TWO cheek kissy kissy thing, it's painful.

Thing is, when it's a farewell meetup (Sunshine Girl's going back to New York) and everyone's excited to see everyone else, all this cheek kissing ensues. And people just look and go "AAHHHHH!!! YOU!!!!!" and rush to kiss you before you can say baby food diet.

and you explain it once, but then more people arrive and pounce on you. Rinse and repeat.

and so you end up shrieking "don't kiss! no kiss!" which makes you sound like a SMINT ad really, and before you can explain or shove a beer in their faces as distraction, they're rubbing stubble all over you. And then you belatedly explain "I just got 2 wisdom teeth taken out 3 days ago. OW"

and they'll wince. and be all sympathetico. and ask you why you cancelled your flight, and why you disappeared off the planet. And once in a while you make some smart remark that since one of them works at an agency called Outer Space, he's the one really, who isn't on this planet.

And then when you leave, they all kiss( or hug if they remember) you again.

ech. So now my cheeks have been sandpapered by Stu's stubble and had pressure applied upon by everyone else.

Listening to: Lighthouse Family- Ain't No Sunshine

Saturday, September 10, 2005

chipmunky accidents

Alvin Simon Theodore!!!!!

doot doot, doo doo doo doo!

Day 3 of The Chipmunk Chronicles.

Turned up at work where the shift manager basically said "I'm Sick. I'm going home. You're running the show. Goodnight" (at 9am)

Worked.

somehow managed to

  • manage a headache due to teeth affecting my sinuses
  • take more nurofen
  • cut myself on a broken saucer...and make it BIG because, well it was a saucer, not a knife
  • not stop bleeding for a full half an hour because painkillers thin your blood
  • overdose on antibiotics because I forgot I had taken an earlier dose
  • nearly faint because of my liquid diet for 3 days
  • drop various inanimate objects (tongs, etc)
  • and still get everything done despite headache, quite literally, singlehandedly.
how well is another question altogether.

I'm going to bed.

home

homies: Possible origin from the French word Hommes which translates to "Men", as in "Pour Hommes"; for men. (urbandictionary)

I prefer to think of it as home-ies. Like they're home.

While I'm hardly delusional, and certainly don't say "fo shizzle" except in jest, I kinda like the word "homies". Like "home boys". Like the boys are home.

***

Home. (click on pictures)

and everywhere in between.

A denizen of both, enamoured with both. But lately more and more, I've come to realise that Melbourne is much more my home than Singapore is.

I leave behind in Singapore, my friends, my family. and of course, the food.

But in Melbourne is where I am allowed to be myself, and where I've literally made my own life.

and as I realise that more friends are now scattered all over the world, the home is with them. And so now, more than ever, I am all over.

***

Tonight, I sat around a table with people, chatting about nothing at all. Or rather, I sat there falling asleep while everyone else was talking. Dogs milled at our feet. and all of sudden, a bright flash of light lit up the night sky.

Lightning.

and the lightning came in sheets. and streaks. and the low rumble of thunder soon followed.

I grinned excitedly as a shover ran down my spine. "I loveit"

heartfelt nods followed. Everyone understood.

It reminded me of home. Except that I was home.

As the night wore on, I went downstairs, curled up on a matress in the lounge, and watched the light display across the night sky through floor-to-ceiling glass windows. The dog pattered around me.

The smell of rain. Rushing in on warm humidity.

Home away from home. Home that was home reminding me of home that no longer was home.

It was almost like the two homes were bypassing each other in a Venn diagram.

My life at present, high rise apartments, the life of living alone, fending for myself; my childhood, of rain and thunderstorms, counting the seconds till thunder hit after the lightning. How far away the storm was.

My tropical home visiting my desert island home.

I am home.

***

Home is....a word that has always eluded me, partly because every place and no place is home. Displacement is home for me. A girl who used to move every 3 months, what was 2 countries to juggle?

but recently, it's become far more concrete, and obvious that I have to make my choice. on one. And it's hard when I realise that there are many more homes too seek out. New York. South America, Cambodia.

Where do I touch home base where I have none? And I've slowly come to the decision that Melbourne may be it. It fully crystalised tonight, through an unconcious answer to a deliberated question. But it may be it.

Reading: Clive Barker's The Yattering and Jack

Thursday, September 08, 2005

I hate slapstick

but somehow I still enjoyed Kung Fu Hustle.

For years I've been avoiding Stephen Chow movies because Stephen Chow= Slapstick and
Myst !=Slapstick. But due to the gazillions of people who've told me they loved Shaolin Soccer, and then said Kung Fu Hustle was even better, I was like.....ohhhhhhkay........*suspiciously turns around* This isn't some American Pie/Not Another Scary Movie thing is this?

I sat through Wedding Crashers cringing. That shows my limit.

But yes, I actually enjoyed Kung Fu. and I finally understand what LCCC meant when he said that Stephen Chow was famous for "nonsense comedy". (Mo Lei Tou?????)

and why didn't anyone tell me Stephen Chow was kinda, sorta, in a weird way cute? Like how Johnny Depp is creepy cool drop dead sexy cute? and Keanu is His Royal Dudeness himself?

Maybe it was his wit. and his floppy hair.

I am such a lian. Worst of all. I am a lian who's a sucker for wit.

heeeeeeeeyyyyyyyy. I know I've said before that I like guys with whatever hair, so long as it suits them, and that still stands...how am I supposed to help it if 42 year olds have floppy hair that really suits them despite being 42?

Listening to: Janet- Runaway

still chipmunky

but Indian Stallion makes me laugh:


Blogging Cliches

1. Apologising for not posting for such a long time. tick
2. Mentioning that you can't think of anything to write about. tick
3. Bitching about another blogger. hmmm. half-tick
4. Writing about how lonely/alone/miserable you are/feel. tick
5. Bitching about how badly your ex treated you and didn't understand you. well, sort of by a long stretch. Do my dodgy posts count?
6. Bitching about how your current bf/gf treats you and doesn't understand you. single, single, single. Thank god I have one less thing to bitch about. I just might explode otherwise
7. Mentioning the words "blog", "blogging", "blogosphere" etc. in your post. oh yes
8. Mentioning how amazing the bf/gf is. see Q.6
9. Plugging other bloggers repeatedly. tick
10.Posting pictures of cute bloggers. Hmmm. sounds like an idea. BRYDON????????? KILLING CULTURE????????? *cough cough*

darn, that chipmunk is so cute I want to take it home.

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

I have not been abused


Just got the last 2 wisdom teeth taken out.



image from:duckrock



I am an oversized chipmunk.

After the anasthetic wore off was when all hell broke loose. Smartass me decided not to use painkillers, ensuring a night of interrupted sleep, and woke up to the horrifying reality that it hurt too much to swallow. Got better through the day, but as far as I know, my mouth now opens just enough for me to literally wrangle a spoon in. And I mean wrangle.

The pain's not too bad (or that could be the work of my trusty napro). The doc was initially saying "no antibios, panadol should do the trick" and after the op said "antibios AND ibuprofen"

yay! yay! yay!

the swelling's expected to get worse tonight and tomorrow. and apparently if the last extraction was anything to go by, I'll be bruising soon- meaning I'll look like an abused oversized chipmunk.

Listening to: Sir Mix-A-Lot- Baby Got Back ( great song I'd forgotten I had...."Oh. My. God. Becky, just look at her butt....she looks like, one of those rap guys girlfriends or something"

Friday, September 02, 2005

Blogday

I forgot about Blogday...so this is late. I don't know any of these people, nor have I even contacted them. I simply like reading them.

Red Dirt Girl
from Canada

This Fish Needs a Bicycle
from the US

Overcaffeinated
Mexico

Chase Me Ladies, I'm in Cavalry

UK

and because the goddamn visa department hates my guts, I shall pretend I'm Singaporean for a moment and give you

kitta
Australia.